The highs & lows of making ADHD Work in 2022
I'm ending 2022 having done more in this year than I could have dreamed of doing in a decade. Setting up a business, publishing 2 books, launching a podcast, coaching hundreds of people, running a retreat... it was like I'd figured out the formula to having ideas, and making them happen.
I also lived in 3 different places, had a hot water bottle explode onto my face, got my drink spiked, was put off dating forever, changed accountants twice, almost died from half a CBD ball, had far too many panic attacks, worked 15 hour days, and struggled a LOT.
Here's how I've managed to do all of these things, including the highs and the lows:
1) Setting up ADHD Works
Setting up a business is terrifying, lonely, and overwhelming. It's also magical, because you can make it whatever you want. I launched ADHD Works in May, with the hope of being able to coach at least 10 people - but I've now coached hundreds.
I've had the honour of coaching everyone from high school students to company CEO's, people on benefits to millionaires, individuals to groups, on zoom and in person at the retreat. Very quickly, I realised I didn't have enough hours in the day to meet the demand for 1:1 coaching, so I found a coach to teach me to make courses. The first ADHD course had 65 people on it, beyond my wildest dreams of approximately 1 person.
I did this by putting myself out there and making myself visible. I wrote about my own struggles through this newsletter, made a link for people to request coaching through, guided them through applying for Access to Work, and offered support in making coaching as accessible as possible.
Highs: getting my first client, who burst into tears when I showed her the programme I'd created. Having an employer pay for their employee to receive coaching as a reasonable adjustment. Launching the ADHD, RSD, Access to Work & workplace courses, and seeing these help people. Seeing the incredible ways my clients transformed their lives, from changing careers to writing books, setting boundaries and reclaiming control over their own lives, and most of all, how finding self-acceptance changed how they felt about their ADHD.
Lows: realising my accountant was ghosting me, finding another one, and learning I was doing everything wrong. Spending far too much money on a contractor who didn't do what they were supposed to. Taking on too much and burning out. Spending the entire month of August shut away in my flat making courses. Not taking breaks, and burning out again. Attempting to run group coaching with a face that was burning off from the hot water bottle, and being forced to go to A&E. Realising I am a workaholic and going to a Workaholics Anonymous call where everybody had ADHD - inescapable!
2) Training organisations
When I first published ADHD: an A to Z and Microsoft invited me to talk to them about ADHD, my dad thought it was a hoax. For someone who was terrified of public speaking, this was my worst nightmare. This year I've trained 11 companies, feeling a sense of confidence I didn't think possible.
This year, I took my frustration at seeing people struggling to get reasonable adjustments put in place by publishing the reasonable adjustments policy template I'd made for a company online for others to use. I posted support on LinkedIn for employers on supporting and harnessing neurodiversity at work, including a Live on how managers can best support people with ADHD. All of this led to requests for talks, which I enabled through this link.
I also sought out opportunities myself. I transformed the Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria I felt after being told RSD wasn't 'academically verified' enough to be in ADHD: an A to Z , and asked for help from people I knew in the health policy world to change this, ending up presenting to Directors at the World Health Organisation a month later. If you want something, figure out who can help you, and go for it.
Highs: speaking for Yahoo!, overcoming my fears to do my first ever in person talk at La Fosse, training one of my favourite companies, Paperchase, and presenting to the World Health Organisation. Being invited back to do a second talk for Lewis Silkin, where I'd gotten to the 7th round of interview to be a solicitor a few years ago.
Lows: my laptop froze during my first talk of the year, causing RSD so crushing that I never wanted to do a talk ever again (despite brilliant feedback!). I also recently spent days hyper focusing on presentation slides for a talk that didn't show up at all during it - something I only realised afterwards. I also had many opportunities that didn't end up happening, for one reason or another - maybe next year!
3) Running an ADHD retreat
One of my dreams is to have a house on the beach where adults can have fun and make friends - because this just doesn't exist in our society. In 2020, I did a yoga teacher training course with the aim of someday running a retreat, but the thought terrified me. Being best friends with Josephine McGrail, who regularly runs retreats, made me realise this was possible.
I asked her if she'd be interested in running an ADHD retreat, and we made it happen. We booked the most beautiful house on the beach to rent in October, and I instantly spiralled into intense anxiety, finding Ari Scott to coach me on selling the retreat. To help promote it, I launched LinkedIn lives and a podcast, which also enabled me to have many conversations with incredible people in my community like Jamie Shields & Paff Evara🌈.
Despite retreats normally taking half a year to sell, we sold out in a month. It was everything I'd hoped and more - we managed to bring together the most amazing group of ADHD-ers and create an ADHD world for a few days, where it was completely normal to show up as our unfiltered versions of ourselves. We now have a long list of people wanting retreats for 2023, so watch this space!
Highs: being featured in Marie Claire, setting up the ADHD Works podcast, selling out of spots on the retreat, & seeing my wonderful coaching client put his dreams into practice by cooking the most mind-blowing food for us all. Head banging on the beach, dancing in the street, swimming in the ocean in October, and seeing the lasting impact this had on the people who joined - from making lifelong friends to deciding to reach their full potential in life.
Lows: I didn't think to make a break between the retreat and 'reality', so I was extremely burned out afterwards, which took me a while to recover from. We also had someone pull out a week before (which worked out for the best!). It was also unthinkably stressful trying to sell and plan the retreat, as it forced me to confront a lot of my own fears in managing a real life group of people with high expectations!
4) Publishing ADHD: an A to Z & The Reality Manifesto
I wrote the Reality Manifesto after becoming overwhelmed by how many desperate kids and parents there were seeking help for social-media-induced mental health challenges. Having modelled since age 13, I'd grown up comparing myself to filtered images of myself, and had somehow lived to tell the tale. I published this on Amazon in May, and ended up on BBC News in the same month.
Having self-published ADHD: an A to Z in 2021, this was acquired by a publisher a few months later. I didn't expect to do much with it in the editing stage, but of course, ended up completely re-writing the book with my year of extra experience as an ADHD coach to add to my lifelong experience of living with ADHD.
It was incredible to record the audiobook for this and remember what I'd written. Even more so to actually celebrate this in person with the people in my life, complete with a Secret Sunrise London silent disco & ADHD magician Alex Sprackling. Even better was to celebrate this online with people all over the world, alongside trailblazers Ellie Middleton (who also wrote the foreword), Charli Clement (who also happen to both be wonderful coaching clients) & TED Talker Abigail Agyei MBE.
Upon its relaunch, ADHD: an A to Z sold out of 6 months of books before publication date, and best of all, I still receive daily messages from people who resonate with the experiences I managed to get out of my head and into the world.
Highs: speaking on BBC News & Sky News about the books. All of the beautiful messages I've received of how they resonate with people around the world. Running 2 launch events, and making it to a book signing to meet these people in 'real life'. Jamie Oliver recommending the Reality Manifesto to his audience. Selling out of ADHD books and knowing they are making a difference. Being invited to Parliament to talk about the Reality Manifesto.
Lows: having a panic attack in the V&A museum in January because I felt so stressed about finishing the Reality Manifesto (completely self-imposed). Rewriting it 5 times over a weekend because I couldn't figure out the audience. Hiring & firing a PR agent. Crying whilst recording my audiobook because I felt so crushed by the loneliness of the words I'd written (& I kept making mistakes). Pouring sugar instead of salt on my pasta at lunch. Cancelling the launch of the Reality Manifesto because I had Covid (and was scared). Spotting grammar mistakes. Holding myself to impossibly high expectations.
5) Writing on LinkedIn
It's an ironic full circle, as I started 2022 with deleting my social media accounts to focus on the Reality Manifesto. I got bored, and ended up writing on LinkedIn, a platform I'd hardly used before, as it seemed awkward and professional and judgemental. Like a networking interview party, where everybody announced their latest achievements as I cringed into a corner, rewriting my CV for the 18th time that week.
I ended 2022 with graduating from the LinkedIn Creator Accelerator Course at their London HQ, surrounded by a community of fellow LinkedIn-er's that seemed to 'get' me - pink hair and all. Writing on LinkedIn has become a daily habit, and it is truly a platform that gives back. Every day, I get to share the highs and lows of my life with a supportive, non-judgemental community. I get to share the learnings along the way, and empower others with my mistakes, lessons and growth.
I did this by realising I needed to stop trying to portray a certain image online, and just be myself. It was when I shared a post out of frustration at my un-cooperative ADHD brain that I realised I was not alone - and community is everything. This is the point of social media: not to sell or promote ourselves as objects, but to engage with others exactly as we are, and connect with like-minded people.
Highs: finding out I'd been accepted onto the LinkedIn Creator Accelerator Programme, running LinkedIn lives with people like Kirstin Coughtrie & Mandy Aulak, receiving some surprise orange socks from LinkedIn in the post, successfully launching the courses & everything else live on LinkedIn.
Lows: when I became overwhelmed with messages & sent template responses, one of which a guy sent me some abuse for. When I invited people to speak on the new podcast & my VA received over 100 emails to schedule, before we realised it was impossible!
6) Launching an ADHD Works Coaching Course
In another full circle of 2022, I've finally done something I've been procrastinating on, and launched an ADHD Works Coaching course. I've realised that I literally cannot do it all, no matter how many courses or retreats I create, because the work simply creates new work. In the end, it's other people that are vital to doing this sustainably in the most effective way - not technology.
Over 400 people have done the ADHD courses in the space of a few months, but by far, the most transformational part of has been the group coaching sessions. By training up more coaches to help me run them, and coach people 1:1, I can empower as many people as possible to ensure ADHD-ers are receiving the support they need to make ADHD work for them.
Taking on the responsibility of new coaches is scary and out of my comfort zone, but I know it's the way forward. If there's one thing I've followed this year, it's been my fear - and it's usually got me to the right place!
Highs: having 11 new coaches join the course in 11 days, and creating another time slot at 5:30pm for group coaching.
Lows: finding out building work will start on my flat from January 9th & hyper-focusing on finishing creating the course over Christmas!
If you've made it this far, thank you. Thank you for being a part of my year, and joining me through the highs and lows of this journey. See you in 2023!